I like slippers, though
885 000 mobile phones down the toilet? Per year?! How is that possible?
I like to think that I have an excellent grasp of the English language. While my vocabulary does not contain every word of Shakespeare's tongue, I find it has been adequate and sufficient for most of my purposes upon this mortal coil that I have so far undertaken. And yet, I have recently found myself in a relatively mundane situation in which my words have failed to express my exact opinions.
You know what? I'm just gonna give up trying to show off my knowing-lots-of-words-ness. I'm not even sure that "mortal coil" is being used correctly but I don't care because it's not at all relevant to the matter at hand (did that sound too much like the first paragraph again? Trying to maintain a balance like that is surprisingly difficult). Which I shall now go on to explain.
First, I would just like to establish that I am no great fan of shoe shopping, and I like it even less when it takes place after school, at times when I should under normal, non-shopping circumstances, be at home. Shoes are supposed to be comfy and I have no great qualms about spending some time trying them on before I decide which ones I want to buy. And I only want to buy shoes when I need to buy them, when old shoes are either too small or are simply falling apart.
This is one reason why I dislike buying new school shoes less than a month before the end of term but, again, I digress from my main point.
While trying on various different pairs, I was expected to describe how they felt, whether there was pressure on my toes, etc, etc. I don't particularly care about these things but I found it ridiculously annoying that I had to keep using the words "fine" and "okay" over and over again. There just aren't any words in the English language to describe differences between near-identical pairs of shoes, nor should there need to be. There are only so many ways to say "they're exactly the bloody same!" without actually saying "they're exactly the bloody same!" and most of the euphemisms are far too subtle for anyone who is interested in shoes to notice.
I really hate shoe shopping.
It sounds petty and silly and it may well be so, but people who expect a hell of a lot out of shoes really need to get their priorities straight. Shoes are a means of protecting our feet from rough surfaces and keeping them warm enough to prevent frostbite when the need arises. Black, size 43 shoes from the same manufacturer really don't vary enough in style to allow for the use of a huge range of adjectives. Deal with it.
I'm not entirely sure what brought this whole rant on but I can't be bothered changing it and if you ignore the content, the writing style isn't that bad. Also, no woodle for today but Sam and I have some ambitious plans for next week's, like multiple sequential panels 'n' stuff.
I like to think that I have an excellent grasp of the English language. While my vocabulary does not contain every word of Shakespeare's tongue, I find it has been adequate and sufficient for most of my purposes upon this mortal coil that I have so far undertaken. And yet, I have recently found myself in a relatively mundane situation in which my words have failed to express my exact opinions.
You know what? I'm just gonna give up trying to show off my knowing-lots-of-words-ness. I'm not even sure that "mortal coil" is being used correctly but I don't care because it's not at all relevant to the matter at hand (did that sound too much like the first paragraph again? Trying to maintain a balance like that is surprisingly difficult). Which I shall now go on to explain.
First, I would just like to establish that I am no great fan of shoe shopping, and I like it even less when it takes place after school, at times when I should under normal, non-shopping circumstances, be at home. Shoes are supposed to be comfy and I have no great qualms about spending some time trying them on before I decide which ones I want to buy. And I only want to buy shoes when I need to buy them, when old shoes are either too small or are simply falling apart.
This is one reason why I dislike buying new school shoes less than a month before the end of term but, again, I digress from my main point.
While trying on various different pairs, I was expected to describe how they felt, whether there was pressure on my toes, etc, etc. I don't particularly care about these things but I found it ridiculously annoying that I had to keep using the words "fine" and "okay" over and over again. There just aren't any words in the English language to describe differences between near-identical pairs of shoes, nor should there need to be. There are only so many ways to say "they're exactly the bloody same!" without actually saying "they're exactly the bloody same!" and most of the euphemisms are far too subtle for anyone who is interested in shoes to notice.
I really hate shoe shopping.
It sounds petty and silly and it may well be so, but people who expect a hell of a lot out of shoes really need to get their priorities straight. Shoes are a means of protecting our feet from rough surfaces and keeping them warm enough to prevent frostbite when the need arises. Black, size 43 shoes from the same manufacturer really don't vary enough in style to allow for the use of a huge range of adjectives. Deal with it.
I'm not entirely sure what brought this whole rant on but I can't be bothered changing it and if you ignore the content, the writing style isn't that bad. Also, no woodle for today but Sam and I have some ambitious plans for next week's, like multiple sequential panels 'n' stuff.
posted by Alasdair Corbett at
10:47 PM
Links to this post:
Create a Link
<< Home